I will be more imaginative – 30 year old ‘Creative Person’

I will rename my dog something really strange and long – Exotically Inclined Person

I resolve to be nice to people without bringing Jesus into the equation – Secular Person

I hope to be able to make people think happy thoughts when they think of me – Goody Good Two Shoes

I will go on long ego trips – Honest Egoist

I will not let lose my bodily functions right when somebody is walking underneath – Crow on the top branch of the tree

I will have noble thoughts – Impure Thinker

I will prognosticate that I will probably procrastinate engaging in all the objectives I have premeditated for this approaching twelvemonth – Honest Wordsmith

I will not puff my entire body to twice its size and screech in her ear after my human has finished watching a horror movie. – Pet Cat

I will not bite the children of lawyers, no matter how much they chase me or how hard they pull my tail.- Pet Dog

With that cloned cow having given birth and everything, I resolve to pay more attention to where my food comes from this next year – Organic Eater

I’ll help the Green House Effect and stop throwing my rubbish into the school drain – Tween boy

I will not hang around girls – they think you love them and that sucks – Tween boy

I will flit gently into the night – Fruit Bat

I will stop throwing water down from the top floor at our school at the people passing below – Tween boy

I will never squat again with my spurs on – Cowboy

I will never again smack a man that’s been chewing tobacco – Cowboy

I will remember that life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce. – Experienced Bouncer

I will remember it isn’t worthwhile wrestling with pigs – you get all muddy and don’t the pigs just love it! – Experienced Mud Wrestler and Pig Keeper.

I will take neither myself nor any of the above seriously – Me