New Year Resolutions which all say but Never do !

I will not look at boys - 13 year old girl

I will not tell the same story at every get together- Incorrigible bore

I will eat ice-cream at midnight - every midnight of the year, I mean, not just this one - Ice-cream Connoisseur

I will not let the dog hog the pillow, growl at me from the sofa, and snatch the bun from my plate - this year she’s going to learn that I’m the Alpha of the house and only I get to do certain things - Owner of untrained dog.

I won’t worry so much - Fuss Budget

I will not tell lies - 10 year old liar.

I need to start worrying a little - The Merry Spirit

I will cut my hair - Longhaired person

I will grow my hair - Shorthaired person

I will shave my head - Hairy person

I will polish my pate - Bald person

I don’t need no STINKING resolutions! - Resolute Stinker

This year I’m going to be kind - Unkind Person

I will do less laundry and use more deodorant - Lazy and Smart Fellow.

This year I’m going to stop being so nice - Person who overdid it.

So many men, so little time - will make more time - Young Woman
I will stop considering other people’s feelings when they so obviously don’t consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits next to me again, I’ll TELL him he stinks! - Diffident classmate of Lazy and Smart Fellow

I will quack like a duck first thing in the morning and last thing at night - Donald Duck Fan

I’m going to learn cuss words in different languages - Expert Cusser in Own Language.

If I see a UFO I won’t tell anybody about it - Spoilsport

I will remember that Muffin Day is on the 29th of every month - Muffin Lover