Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.

Half of the people in the world are below average.

If you don’t know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else!
_Yogi Berra.

“People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don’t realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world,”
_Calvin.

Isn’t your pants’ zipper supposed to be in the front?
_Calvin and Hobbes.

I could tell that my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
_Rodney Dangerfield

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed.
_Albert Einstein

Marriage is like pi – natural, irrational, and very important.
_Lisa Hoffman.

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

A rich man’s joke is always funny.

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.
_Winston Churchill.