There is this fireman who’s working at a station house on his fire truck when he notices a little girl beside him with a fireman’s hat and a little red wagon with a small ladder attached to it and the wagon tied to a dog. The fireman walks up to her and asks “What are you doing little girl?” The girl answers “I am playing with my dog. I am the fireman and thats my fire truck run by my dog.” The fireman looks closer to her wagon and notices that the so called fire truck is being tied with the dog’s testicles. The man not knowing what to say to her says “You have a beautiful fire truck, but don’t you think your truck would run faster if you tie it with the neck of your dog?” The little girl replied “Yeah mister, you are right. But then my fire truck would not have a siren.” Lol!!!

There is this guy who wants to castrate himself. So he goes to a doctor and says “I want to be castrated.” The doctor looking at him with surprise says “I will never recommend you to do that. It’s against my advise.” The guy says “If you not gonna do it, I will seek for another doctor.” The doctor agrees and still insists him no to do it but finally the guy is being castrated. The very next day he is walking around the hospital with bandages allover his private area and sees another man with bandages too. He looks at him and says “Well! We’ve been through same operation.” The man says “Yeah! and I am so happy that I have done it finally after waiting for long 37 years just to get myself circumcised.” The guy completely horrified and panicked says “WTF! That’s the word!!”

There are these three men who are captured by cannibals. Cannibals tell them that “You three will be killed and skinned. Your flesh will be eaten and your skin will be turned into canoes. But I being the chief grant all of you with your last request of your life.” The three desperate are scared that they are gonna be killed but finding no way to escape, the first man requests that “Kill me in the most painless way possible.” So the cannibals poison him making him die a slow and painless death. The second man asks for paper and pen as he wants to write the last loving letter to his family before dying. So the cannibals grant him with that. The third man asks for a fork. Everyone around gets confused that what is he going to do with a fork. However, he is given a fork. The third man takes the fork in his hand pointing toward himself and starts to stab himself badly allover screaming and shouting saying “Go to hell! Now make the canoes out of me!!”

There is this young engineer who is having an interview. The interviewer asking all of his question and finding him good asked the engineer “Well, what salary do you expect?” The engineer with full confidence tells ” $125,000 as starting salary rest depends on benefit packages.” The interviewer then said “Well, what if I offer you with a full package of minimum 5 weeks vacation, 15 holidays paid, full dental and medical aid, 50% retirement fund for you, a fully furnished compartment and a new car every 3 months?” The engineer jumping out of his seat said “Wow Man! Are you kidding me?” The interviewer said “Surely yes, but don’t blame me, you started it!” Lol!!

There is this new teacher in a class of little ones trying to explain them that she is an American. Then she asks her students “How many of you are Americans too?” The students not really knowing what to answer but just wanted to be like their teacher so all of them waved their hands in the air except one. The teacher surprised asked the little girl “Why didn’t you raise your hand?” The girl replied ” Because I am not an American.” The teacher then asked “Then What are you?” The girl replied “I am a proud Canadian. My Mom is a Canadian and my father is a Canadian too so I am also a Canadian.” The teacher taken aback said “That’s no reason. If your dad was a moron and your mom was a moron too then you are also a moron?” The little girl with an innocent smile on her face replied “Then I’d rather be an American.” Lol!

There is this woman who’s about to have triplets. The triplets in her stomach are talking to each other.
The first baby said to others “I want to be a plumber so that I can fix so much of water in here!”
The second baby said “I want to be an electrician so that there can be some light as its too dark in here.” The third baby said “I want to be a hunter, so that when that snakes comes again I will cut its head off.” Lol!!