Funny Riddles

How many bricks does it take to complete a building made of brick?
Only one, the last one.

What is everything to someone, and nothing to everyone else?
Your mind.

Big as a biscuit, deep as a cup, even a river cant fill it up. What is it?
A kitchen strainer.

What goes up and never comes down?
Your age.

Dim Bulb Riddles

Q: How many Marxists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None: The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.

Q: How many Country Western singers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three! One to change it and two to sing about missing the old burnt out one.

Q: How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: That’s not funny!!!

Q: How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.

Q: How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. It turned itself in.

Q: How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.

Q: How many software people does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. That’s a hardware problem.

Q: How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. They just have marketing portray the dead bulb as a feature.

Q: How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: The entire team! And they all get a semester’s credit for it!

Q: How many poets does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three. One to curse the darkness, one to light a candle…and one to change the bulb.

Redneck Riddles

What do a divorce in Alabama, a tornado in Kansas, and a hurricane in Florida have in common?
Somebody’s fixin’ to lose them a trailer.

What do you get when you have 32 rednecks in the same room?
A full set of teeth.

What’s the most popular pick-up line in Arkansas?
Nice tooth!

What do they call “Hee Haw” in Arkansas?
A documentary.

What do they call it in Kentucky?
Life Styles of the Rich & Famous.

How can you tell if a Texas redneck is married?
There is dried chewing tobacco on both sides of his pickup truck.

How many rednecks does it take eat a ‘possum?
Two. One to eat, and one to watch out for traffic.

Why did God create armadillos?
So that Texas rednecks can have ‘possum on the halfshell.

Where was the toothbrush invented?
Oklahoma. If it was invented anywhere else it would have been called teethbrush.

Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Tennessee State Lottery?
The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.

Did you hear that the governor’s mansion in Little Rock, Arkansas burned down?
Yep. Perty’ near took out the whole trailer park.

Some Riddles

Question : A black dog stands in the middle of an intersecton in a town painted black. None of the street lights are working due to a power failure caused by a storm. A car with two broken headlights drives towards the dog but turns in time to avoid hitting him. How could the driver have seen the dog in time?
Answer : Who said this happened during the night?

Question : You want to build a stone wall around your 12′x20′ garden. If the bricks are 6″ high & 6″ wide and 1′ long,. How many bricks will you need to make a wall 6″ wide & 4′ tall ?
Answer : A Stone Wall has no bricks!!!

An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant. The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer hide. A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide. The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret. He built this one a two story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide. The chief then challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred.
Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys.
“Correct,” said the chief. “How did you figure it out?”
The warrior answered, “It’s elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides.”

In a contest, four fruits (an apple, a banana, an orange, and a pear) have been placed in four closed boxes (one fruit per box). People may guess which fruit is in which box. 123 people participate in the contest. When the boxes are opened, it turns out that 43 people have guessed none of the fruits correctly, 39 people have guessed one fruit correctly, and 31 people have guessed two fruits correctly.
The Riddle : How many people have guessed three fruits correctly, and how many people have guessed four fruits correctly?
The Answer: It is not possible to guess only three fruits correctly: the fourth fruit is then correct too! So nobody has guessed three fruits correctly and 123-43-39-31 = 10 people have guessed four fruits correctly.

Difficult Riddles

You write on me and secrets I can keep;
In places never seen, I spin like a top;
Though stiff as a board, I’m often described like a mop.
What am I?
Answer - a floppy disk.

Take away my first letter and I am unchanged;
Take away my second letter and I am unchanged;
Take away all my remaining letters and I am still unchanged!
What am I?
Answer - The postman or a mailbox.

Jenn picked a book off the highest shelf in her room. On the spine she read How to Jog. She ran out of the room and opened the book but found it had absolutely nothing to do with jogging.
Explain…….
Answer - The book Jenn picked up was one of a set of encyclopedias; she picked up the volume containing entries beginning with the letters “HOW” through the letters “JOG”.

What is that which goes with a car, comes with a car, is of no use to a car, and yet the car cannot go without it?
Answer - Noise.

Easy Riddles

What starts with ‘T’, ends with ‘T’, and is full of ‘T’?
Answer - Teapot.

What force and strength cannot get through, I with a gentle touch can do.
And many in the street would stand, were I not a friend at hand.
What am I?
Answer - A Key.

Child Riddles

Q: Why does the stork stand on one leg?
A: Because if he took the other leg off the ground he would fall on the ground!

Q: What is the only thing you can break when you say it’s name?
A: Silence.

Q: Where can everyone always find money when they look for it?
A: In the dictionary.

Q: What is the difference between here and there?
A: The letter “t”.

Q: When does a joke become a father?
A: When the catch line becomes apparent (a parent).

Q: What word, by changing the position of one letter, turns into its opposite?
A: United = Untied

Q: What word is it from which the whole may be taken and yet some will be left?
A: Wholesome

Q: What is the most difficult train to catch?
A: The 12:50, because it’s 10 to 1 if you catch it.

Q: What tongue can wag and yet never utter a word?
A: The tongue of your shoe.

Q: What’s smaller than an ant’s mouth?
A: What the ant eats.

Q: What word of five letters has only one left when two letters are removed?
A:Stone = (St)one.